Saturday, October 28, 2006

PMS Blues

In the words of Dolly Parton:

"Most times I'm easy goin'
Some say I'm good as gold,
But when I'm PMS, I tell you,
I turn mean and cold.

It makes us hate our husbands,
Our lovers, and our boss,
Why, I can't even count the good friends
I've already lost
From the

PMS Blu-u-ues
PMS Blues, oh Lord.

I don't even like myself,
But it's somethin' I can't help,
Got those rantin', ravin', misbehavin'
PMS Blues."


If I've been cranky lately, there's a reason. Hormones affect me in a way that they don't most women. I do things that might be deemed clinically insane if anyone was brave enough to try and diagnose me. I get mean, to everyone, for any reason. I cry because someone got my order wrong at a restaurant. I mean, I yelled at my 6 month old to stop it the other day. I realized as soon as I did that that was really dumb; she doesn't know what she's doing, and she doesn't know what I'm saying. But I yelled, and in the moment, it seemed a reasonable response to her grabbing my glasses off my face. (Luckily she thought that was hilarious and laughed her little head off.) And when I'm pregnant, it's like 9 months of PMS. But worse. I've yelled at bishops, friends, ten-year-old children, for next to no reason. I've gotten so wild I throw things, break things, storm out of the house and don't tell anyone where I'm going, threaten to (and intend to) kill myself. My husband has learned to treat me with kid gloves when I'm hormonally volatile (and has such an inoffensive personality he dodges most bullets instinctively.) Even so, he gets yelled at for things like moving the blanket two inches or asking me if I need to eat or drink something. So if I've yelled at you or snapped at you or been otherwise rude in the last week, please know it's not me. This is not an excuse, it's the plain truth. I do my best to control myself, but I'm NOT myself. I'm really not. And I AM sorry afterwards if I remember what I did. So my apologies. Mr. Hyde has come to stay the week, and much as I want to turn him away, I just don't know how.

9 comments:

No Cool Story said...

:(

Dawnyel said...

I can SO relate! It's a wonder I still have friends AND my husband! (And I've been told that it's something I can control....HA!!) Anyway, I so can sympathize, and I hope next week is better! :)

Anne/kq said...

Oh, man, dawnyel, I hate that! Like the gym teacher who would tell us to go run off our cramps, because HER cramps were the kind that were kind of painful and if you walked or ran it helped them go away. (Mine, OTOH, were/sometimes are the kind that leave me debilitated in bed even with prescription AND OTC pain medication.)

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you've had a rough week - here's hoping that the next week will be a lot better!

Chocolate usually works for me....

happy mommy said...

That sounds serious. I have found myself having very similar symptoms since the birth of my last baby. Does anything help you? Or do you just have to white knuckle through it? I have been thinking about going to see my OBGYN about it. Let me know if you figure out anything that helps!

Hope you feel more yourself now.

Suzanne said...

It's refreshing to see such an honest post about PMS! I can totally relate! When I was pregnant, I felt like I had PMS for 9 straight months. I was constantly crying about things that were a concern, but not worth sobbing about. Good luck finding ways to ease your symptoms.

Thanks for visiting my BLOG! :)

txmommy said...

{{{{HUGS}}}}

No Cool Story said...

I'm with Happy Mommy.
I have had a few thing to deal with, finally got some help, and it has made a world of difference.
Chocolatey Hugs to you.

Anne/kq said...

Well, I have no health insurance, so I don't go in for almost anything.

Even if I did, though, I've had this problem since I was a teenager and nothing I've tried has ever helped with it.